When I said that I forgot how it feels to be in love, I missed out one other big thing. I forgot how it felt to be out of love. So maybe it's not so bad that I am unwanted. But even that mere 3 days of sweetness was good to have, to feel loved, wanted.

"Think I'm getting stronger... Day by day by day.." - Stronger, SURREAL

Does it mean that if I'm so emotionally weak even from such a minor incident mean that I'm not ready for a relationship? Are those people who are so-called ready for relationships so strong and comfortable about being single that even if they were suddenly thrown from being in a relationship to being single again they'd be fine? No right?

I thought I was strong enough to stick to what I said, but no, I'm too weak. The elation of being in a "relationship" albeit non-official was brilliant but the knowledge of another party involved in it all makes the whole thing like a * rollercoaster ride. You know what? I hate rollercoaster rides. (And yes I just used the "f" word, I don't like to censor, I don't like censored films and I don't think I stumble anyone cos my readership is quite low and the audience is mature. That's what I thought, until my 12-year-old cousin messaged me on msn and said "I'm on rotek... now.")

Like a rollercoaster ride, my Lord...

Don't ask me who she is, I won't tell. Don't ask me if I'm ok, I am not.